Tuesday

I didn’t sleep well last night, too much going around in my head. I honestly don’t know what to do for the best at the moment. I have so much conflicting advice being given to me and I am not in a sound enough mental state to judge my own opinion in relation to others. What I am trying to remember is that I have the best interests of me at heart, and with that the best interests of my kids. Others have their own interests involved somewhere in any advice that they are giving me. I’ve spoken to my ex hubbie, my best friend and a slightly less close friend in the last 12 hours and I’m just confused as I ever was. I have a couple of people lined up this morning who have agreed to listen to my thought process and then I need to work out fairly quickly what to do.

As I’ve said before, all I want is to be left to work and earn a living. I don’t want anyone I work with to be subjected to the bullying that I am subjected to and that is where this hurts. I’m not just playing with my life in the decisions I make this week, I’m playing with others as well. And not just anyone else’s life, but mainly my bestie friend in the world.

I’m not interested in reading any blogs about me or what people may think of this blog. The fact that there have been so many hostile visitors here over the last 12 hours and not one of them has been brave enough to leave a comment or admit who they are speaks volumes. They are not friends, they are either bullies or bully encouragers as far as I am concerned. If you see something wrong being done and you don’t step up and question it you are as bad as those who are in the wrong I think.

If you have any questions for me, ask me. I’ve offered 2 bloggers who regularly blog about me the option to ask me questions, I’ll answer and they’ll post the answers on their blogs. Both turned me down. Probably because the truth isn’t as interesting as all of their cobbled together half truths. Nobody likes to deal in real life, they want the intrigue and the blog hits and the rumours and the flat out lies.

Well this is about my real life here, I’m happy to chat to anyone who comments or gets in touch as a result of this  blog as long as you want to be constructive and not just nasty. This may get even more real if I decide today that keeping the moral high ground is not helping me at all. Who knows.

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